My nakakilala akong guy nung una sabi nya hes annuled already so ako nmn tanga go lng kc annuled na..nagkaroon kami anak den buong family ko ok sa kanya..at some point gusto nmin makasigurado gusto nmin tignan NSO cenomar nya pero ayaw nya ibigay pangalan parents nya..nagtaka kami hanggang napilit ko cya na umamin na hes still married at ung annulment daw nagkaroon ng prob na nagaway daw cla both x wife nya kya pinahihirapan daw cya..pero pinipilit ko pa rin cya ibigay name nanay nya pero ayaw nyang ibigay kc linalayo daw kami sa gulo lalo n sa anak namin at dahil my sakit din nanay nya sa highblood..financially wala nmn ako masasabi sa kanya at nagbibigay cya..sabi nya mahal nya ako pero but ganun d p rin alam ng side nya n my anak kami at kuya lng nya na isa my alam. di p kami naguusap personally kc nasa abroad cya..maniniwala b ako sa kanya o hintayin ko makapag usap kami personally? Bawal b ung relationship nmn kc hes still attached...nid some advice..

Let us tackle first 'yung tanong mo kung bawal ba 'yung relationship ninyo... if the other person is still legally married to another person, the obvious answer is "YES"... sabi nga nila, sa mata ng tao at sa Diyos... but I will not try be judgmental with your situation and relationship - I will leave that to you at doon sa nasa itaas... naniniwala kasi ako sa "sincerity" ng isang tao... and I believe, ito ang mas tinitingnan ng nasa itaas kaysa sa mga dokumento... if you really love a person, no matter what or regardless of what, 'yung true feeling ang dapat na may value... and you should based your decision on that true feeling accordingly... pero hindi lang 'yung feeling mo ang dapat mong ikunsidera, kungdi pati na din 'yung totoo n'yang nararamdaman sa 'yo... afterall, that is the essence of a relationship i.e. it should be a two-way road...

For me, it is OK to love someone or somebody - kahit hindi naman s'ya dapat mahalin (mahal mo eh, ano ang magagawa mo doon?) - but it doesn't mean na magpakatanga ka (I'm really sorry for that word)... let's put it in this way... kung mahal mo ang isang tao, regardless na bawal o hindi ang inyong nabuong relasyon at ipinaglalaban ka, then it is probably worth to fight for that relationship - until you find a way to correct it and make it uncomplicated and acceptable – to all...

Pero kung mag-isa ka lang na nag-struggle at nakikibaka sa relasyon n’yo, it is probably not worthy to continue that relationship... you can still continue to love that person, as long na s'ya pa din talaga ang itinitibok ng iyong puso, but give yourself dignity and respect and let him find his true happiness... kahit hindi na para sa iyong mga magulang, kapatid o kamag-anak, para sa sarili mo na lang at sa inyong anak... sabi ko nga, may mga tao na hindi dapat sigurong mahalin, pero kung bakit, natutunan pa din nating mahalin... and that wouldn't make us a bad person... pero kung one-sided lang ang pagmamahal, it is not really worthy to continue the relationship... kasi, for sure, in the end, baka maging "hatred" pa 'yung "love" na naramdaman mo sa kanya... and this is the thing that will make you now a bad person i.e. kapag nagsimula ka nang magtanim ng galit ang iyong puso...

What you have to do? Sa totoo lang, ikaw lang din naman talaga ang makakapagsabi kung gaano ba ka-seryoso o ka-totoo 'yung taong mahal mo sa iyo... and based on how serious or how much he really love you, 'yun na ang dapat mong basehan ng gagawin mong desisyon... halimbawa, kung talagang alam mo (deep inside at walang pag-aalinlangan) na mahal ka n'ya talaga, then together, with his side, stay and fight for that relationship - and try to correct it along the way i.e. annulment sa previous relationship and then pakasal kayo... now, kung alam mo na ikaw lang ang nagmamahal ng tapat at totoo, and it is only a one-way road, you have to let him go... no matter how hard that letting go is, you have to do it... hindi lamang para sa sarili mo, kungdi para na din doon sa taong mahal mo... again, for him to find his true happiness... dahil sa wala namang tao na nagiging "happy" kung hindi n'ya talaga mahal o napipilitan lang s'yang makisama doon sa taong pinakikisamahan n'ya... and when that happens, isa lang ang dapat na ipa-assure mo sa kanya na huwag n'yang pababayaan 'yung inyong anak... ano man ang mangyari sa inyong dalawa, dapat na hindi masira ang kinabukasan ng inyong anak...

@joshua_sx1 tnx sa feedbak.. Sa katunayan bilang babae masasabi ko na di nmn one sided relationship nararamdaman ko na mahal nya ako..since nagkakilala kami hanggang ngaun the same pa rin treatment nya walang pagbabago..at tlgang masasabi ko mahal nya ako..kinausap nmn nya family side ko n hes married but still in annulment process..sabi ng side ko hwag umasa kc it takes years daw un..kahit sabihin mong d n cla nagsasama but still my asawa p rin cya at im a mistres..gusto nya i magexplain but he wanted to do it personally kesa sa phone kc nga nasa ibang bansa cya..constant nmn comunication namin araw araw. Wala akong nakita o naramdaman na pagseselos sa iba kc very open cya sa buhay nya..bka kc madala ako sa family side ko na bawal ang relationship namin..

Look, huwag mo nang alalahanin 'yung sa family side ninyo... 'yun anak ninyo ang dapat mong bigyan ng mas importanteng kunsiderasyon sa mga nangyayari... dapat ninyong maayos 'yung situasyon ninyo, hindi dahil sa kamag-anak mo, o kamag-anak n'ya, o kahit sa mga kapit-bahay ninyo, kungdi para sa anak ninyo...

Sabi mo na mahal ka naman n'ya, siguro marapat lamang na hindi lamang kayo "open" sa isa't-isa, kungdi, magtulungan... at 'yon ang ipaunawa mo sa kanya... gusto mong malaman ang totoong situasyon para in case na may maitutulong ka sa kanya, pupuwede kang mag-share... and that is the essence ng relationship - sharing of everything... hindi dapat ikimkim o sarilinin ng isa sa inyo ang problema ninyong dalawa... dapat dalawa kayong nagtutulungan... and likewise, paano ka makakatulong kung hindi mo alam ang totoong situasyon?... and besides, sarilinin man n'ya o hindi ang problema, maapektuhan pa din kayo ng anak ninyo in the end... it is inevitable... hindi n'ya pupuwedeng sabihin na ayaw n'ya kayong madamay dahil sa totoo lang, sa una pa lang, damay na kayo - sa ayaw n'ya o hindi... in fact, kaya nga s'ya may ganyang problema ay dahil sa inyo... paano n'ya sasabihin ngayon sa 'yo na ayaw n'ya kayong madamay?... the only thing na para maiiwas n'ya kayo at hindi na madamay pa, ay kung kusa na s'yang lalayo sa inyo...

After, let say, na nai-discuss mo ang importance ng hindi lamang pagiging "open" ninyo sa bawat-isa, kungdi pati na din 'yung importance ng "sharing" ninyo sa bawat-isa, at patuloy pa din n'ya na sinarili ang problema ninyo, it is up to you to decide... but again, you can never help him kung hindi mo alam ang totoong situasyon... at hindi pupuwedeng hindi kayo madamay, dahil kahit anong mangyari, mabuti man o hindi, maaapektuhan tiyak kayong mag-ina...

advice din ng brother nya na hwag na nya daw ipaalam sa wife nya or ex wife nya na my iba n cya at may anak na kami kc daw baka mas lalong hindi pirmahan ng babae ung annulment papers kc nag-away daw cla ng girl this december lng regarding sa suporta (money matters) at sabi daw kc ng girl pahihirapan daw cya at sisiguraduhing di siya maikakasal sa iba.. i dont know lng if this is true. nakausap na daw ng attorney nya ung babae at hinihintay lng din nila ung exwife nya umuwe sa pinas kc nasa part ng europe ung girl..my trust naman ako sa tatay ng anak ko pero still i cant deny the fact din na mag-isip..very risky db? hoping bigyan kami ni Lord ng chance na makapag-usap personally...if he can't come home il be the one to go there..gusto ko lng malinawanagan ang lahat..bout are feelings to each other wala akong doubt pero our situation right now, parang nakikipaglaro ako sa apoy..noon, hate na hate ko ung mga taong naninira ng pamilya but look where i am now? haiiist..however, lage ko naman cinasabi if maayos pa nya family nya balikan na lng nya wife nya..pero he said di na raw nya mahal respeto na lng daw bilang tao natitira to her.

Give yourself sometime to process everything. If you just found out that he's still legally married, malamang tuliro at feeling cheated pa ang pakiramdam mo now. You're hurt and believe me, you have every right to feel that way. Stop thinking about what other people are thinking about you. Of course, your family will not warrant or agree to your set up, understandable iyon dahil pamilya mo sila, they only want what's best for you. But after you're done crying and feeling sorry, you should start thinking about what's best for your child and what you really want.

You repeatedly said na ramdam mo naman na mahal ka niya, ang tanong ko lang, has he given you reason(s) to doubt that? Give him an ultimatum to make things right for you and your child's future. Kung nakikita mo naman na gumagawa siya ng paraan to correct everything, doon mo lang ma-weweigh ang sincerety and love niya for you and your kid. Matagal ang annulment process, but the most important thing is 'yung makita mong he's going the extra mile to fix it.

You can't do anything about his past anymore, now that you know about it.. ask yourself if you are willing to embrace and accept him for all his flaws.

Most importantly, pray for divine providence so that He will guide you with all your decisions.

No he has never given me any risons to doubt his love...and according to him he will try his best to fix it..but how they will fix their annulment eh parang bitter ung girl..tsaka parang ayaw pumirma..and the prob nasa different country sila so how they will settle? Pray na lang ako that God will guide me..

The situation is beyond your control anymore. So tama nga na ipagdasal mo na lang that God will place his healing hands sa heart 'nung ex wife niya baka eventually she finds it in her heart to fogive and let go. Anyway, if you feel na sincere at talagang mahal ka naman ng father of your child at hindi naman siya nagkukulang ng pag provide sa inyo, then maybe what you both have is something worth fighting for.

People will always have something to say, good or bad. So be careful whom to listen to and trust. It's always best to seek refuge in prayers and listen to what your heart says.

I wish you well.

@alingotik..tnx..yap il just pray..i believe the power of prayers..i know God will answer my prayers abd he will lead me the right path..

Update po...araw araw ko pinagdadasal na bigyan ako ng sign ni lord if pagpatuloy ko relationship ko...kahapon lng my biglang lumtaw sa fb account ko na suggested friend iba name pero ung pics familiar..i open it at picture nga silang mag asawa..sabi nya wala n cla..pero sa mga picture freshly taken pa lng un...buong mundo ko bumagsak..naloko ako...lage nya cnasabi wala cyang fb acount pero lahat sinagot ni lord panalangin ko..plz help me wat to do..

You asked for signs, it was given. Do not drown yourself into self pity, the best thing to do is confront him. Mahirap naman kase mag jump into conclusion. Based sa pag-uusap niyo, you can already tell if nagdadahilan lang siya. From there, magdesisyon ka na.